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Sympathy bleeds ignorance smashes a hole through your soul,
The commas are superfluous.
Politesse hard yearned those few made parole,
The commas remain superfluous.

Word on the streets: the benign are divine,
Thus the truth speaks:
Your life is yours, my life is mine,
Thus the truth reeks.

I refuse to see, I live in denial,
Is the world really that Ruthless?
But that flotsam on the Nile,
Was once a Babe, toothless.

Father heard his children scream,
So he threw them in the stream,
Saying, as he drowned the third,
"Children should be seen, not heard!"

Condolences.
:iconcarnalcarnage:

Author's Comments

I was sitting around, randomly stringing words together in my head because I had nothing better to do, when that opening line hit me. The rest just formed.

~Hermux-Tantamoq summed it up perfectly when he read it:
"Each of the four baseplates were independent and their seemingly unrelated plots moved ahead ever so slightly. Yet you needed to touch each to make the run. The jovial enigma was well-stacked; the footnote bound the square decently. :v"

Comments


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:iconwolfxgizmosis:
The last paragraph cracked me up.... yeah. Actually I really like you're opening sentence to. In fact I have a favorite line in each one.
I really like this, its very powerful, I don't think there is any thing I don't like about this poem.
:iconcarnalcarnage:
Thank you! For the :+fav: too. It means a lot to me. Really. :)

--
“Firstly, there is no such person as Death. Second, Death's this tall guy with a bone face, like a skeletal monk, with a scythe and an hourglass and a big white horse and a penchant for playing chess with Scandinavians. Third, he doesn't exist either.”
:iconwolfxgizmosis:
XD Its worth faving! more people need to give literature a chance on DA!
:iconcarnalcarnage:
I know, right?
But to be honest, sometimes I have very little patience with poetry. But then again, the brilliant stuff you see once in a while makes up for it. :)

[link]

and

[link]

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“Firstly, there is no such person as Death. Second, Death's this tall guy with a bone face, like a skeletal monk, with a scythe and an hourglass and a big white horse and a penchant for playing chess with Scandinavians. Third, he doesn't exist either.”
:iconteenyxtinyxtina:
Wonderful piece of literature, it was sarcastic and humorous. The only thing was this line:
Sympathy bleeds ignorance smashes a hole through your soul
It feels like it needs a comma in there somewhere, but overall, excellent work. :)

--
:flagcanada:
Prose Admin for =DailyLitDeviations
Send me suggestions.
:iconpickled-poppy:
Wowza this is a really smashing piece of lit.
I like it alot

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I like the words Smashing, Golly, Gosh, Corking,Cracking and Soliloquy.
My current contest [link]
I'm a poetry admin for *DailyLitDeviations
:iconcarnalcarnage:
Thank you!
But the commas were left out intentionally.

--
“Firstly, there is no such person as Death. Second, Death's this tall guy with a bone face, like a skeletal monk, with a scythe and an hourglass and a big white horse and a penchant for playing chess with Scandinavians. Third, he doesn't exist either.”
:iconcarnalcarnage:
I';ppreciate the appreciation. :)

--
“Firstly, there is no such person as Death. Second, Death's this tall guy with a bone face, like a skeletal monk, with a scythe and an hourglass and a big white horse and a penchant for playing chess with Scandinavians. Third, he doesn't exist either.”

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June 3
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